The boy with the guitar

Give me the boy with the guitar
The one that can make me forget the crap in my life
By just plucking a few strings
And taking my breath away

Give me the boy with the smile
The one that makes my head spin around and my heart stop beating
By just breaking through like the sun
And brightening my day

Give me the boy with the smirk
The one that makes me want to strangle him and kiss him at the same time
By driving me insane
And making me love him even more

Give me the boy with the mind

The one that intrigues me and makes me want to know what makes it tick

By puzzling me more every day

And making me want to sort through the pieces

Give me the boy with the voice

The one that makes me laugh harder and love stronger

By just singing a few lines

Or saying a few words

Give me the boy

The one that I know is there

Please just come out

And meet the girl with the broken heart

Who has always been here

Listen up, heart

OK heart, we need to have a little talk.

This has gotten out of control.

You know I can't love him.

Yeah I know, I know, he's all we ever wanted.

Talented

funny

sweet

flirty

amazing

beautiful

intelligent

everything...

But you have to ignore that.

You NEED to ignore that.

Cause you know who he is, what he's like,

and I can't stand to have you broken again.

I tried to write about nature

I tried to write about nature

But my heart bubbled up and I couldn't bring it back down.

My heart thuds in my chest like an angry parent on the door when I see him.

Thump.

Thump.

Thump.

He grabs the wild heart and squeezes it to dust when I see him with her.

Or her.

Or her.

Or her.

He walks away, clueless, and I am completely crushed from the pain.

No more.

No more.

No more.

STOP.

Of course I had to be the one who falls for the biggest player in the school.

The one who everyone says is no good and I shouldn't waste my time on.

But I don't want the player.

I don't like him at all.

I want the boy underneath the mask.

The one that I saw. That one day.

You probably didn't even think about it,

but maybe that's why you avoid my gaze.

Because as soon as we starred into each others eyes I saw the boy behind the player.

The boy who is just like everyone else.

Maybe a bit different though.

Different enough to find the need to cover him up.

A boy who's afraid.

I'm afraid too, boy.

But even I can't hide forever.

Maybe I'm wrong, maybe you are just a straight up jerk and I should forget all about you,

but your eyes speak louder then your words.

I'm just not sure which one to trust right now.

Murderer

Sometimes doing the right thing is the hardest thing to do.

I had to make a really hard decision this week.

I had to crush someone's heart. 

I felt it was the right decision.

I feel peace about it.

So then why do I feel like a murderer?

Someone gave me their heart.

I thought someone loved me.

I thought someone trusted me.

And I had to try to shove his heart back into his chest without breaking it,

which is much harder than it sounds.

I didn't want to break his heart.

I didn't want to break mine.

But I had to.

We are too young.

We both need some growing up to do.

A few more heartbreaks to get us toughened up.

A few more high school crushes to crush us.

Sometimes it takes a heart dying to realize you need to be more careful with it.

I just wish I didn't have to be the one to destroy his.